Scars
by kakuya
Summary: Scars represent battles a person has gone through. What kind of battles has Kagome gone through to receive them? what does Sesshomaru have to do with them?


_I don't own Inu-Yasha._

As each day passed by his kisses became empty. The 'I love you' had died down and he said nothing to her. Every day that she visited him he seemed to get colder and colder. She would go home and night and look at herself and the mirror and cry bitterly. She cried, wishing that she knew the reason why he didn't love her anymore.

He used to always smile at her and kissed her gently every chance he got. He told her she was beautiful and that no one could compare to her. He said he could love no other like he loved her. Why did he say those things?

She stared at the small razor that lay on her dresser. She shook her head and closed her eyes. She knew once she started it would be impossible to stop. She would mar her fair skin with ugly scars, but she sighed. The pain would be nothing. Her heart felt like it was dying from the inside. She felt abandoned and hurt.

She shakily picked up the razor and examined it with a resentful gaze. She had cut herself multiple times before. But he had told her she needed to stop. And so she did. She thought that he could take her away from the pain and agony she had put herself in. He did, for a while, but he had just numbed the pain. Now he was going away from her. It was starting again. The almost faded scars that adorned her arms tingled.

The silver edge mocked her and dared her to cut herself. She angrily threw it across the room and sigh heavily. She went to her bed and lay there staring at the blue ceiling. She turned her head to the stuffed animal that she always slept with when she was sad. The little stuffed dog was white and had hazel eyes. Her gaze saddened, as she looked at it longer. The dog reminded her too much of him. The eyes itself were enough to tear her inside. She gently put it on the blue carpet and shoved it under her bed with the tips of her fingers.

She slid under the covers and began to dream, hoping to find peace. Then there was a knock on her door.

"Kagome-nee-chan. I had a nightmare…" a small scared voice said. The door opened to reveal a small little girl no less than four. The little girl held her teddy bear close to her and had her thumb in her mouth.

"Come her Rin." Kagome said. The little girl toddled to the woman's bed and fell into the comforting embrace that made all of her fears fade away.

"Nee-chan… will I get to see Sesshomaru-kun?" the four year old asked. Rin had no idea what was going on with them. Kagome stiffened slightly at the question.

"I don't know Rin." Kagome said softly. She began to fall asleep and Rin began to fall asleep too.

--------

A silver haired youkai sat in a leather chair staring at the fireplace. He made no movement and he looked like a god carved out of marble. He was in deep thought. Every time he would close his eyes her face would show up.

As much as he would like to keep to himself, he was deeply in love with her, yet he was breaking her heart. He knew the moment his ex, Kagura would come around he would stray. He would try not to, but it would happen either way.

Kagome. That name made his normally hard and cold heart warm up. He loved the smell of the roses and vanilla she gave off. Her smile was like little bells. He remembered when he had first met her. It was his senior year and her sophomore year. She had been the quiet popular girl who had always been the nice one. He had been the jock who played football and baseball.

What was strange about her was that she would always wear long sleeved shirts even if it was burning hot. He came up to her and asked her about it and she had replied quiet angrily that he 'should mind his own fucking business'. They had started to get closer and when he when he had graduated he asked her to go out with him. She had hesitantly agreed.

Even though she was popular she had never had a boyfriend. He would soon find out why. She had held of from having him meet her parents and she never told him why. He threatened to end their relationship if she would not tell him why. She had cried to him and told him that her and her parents don't get along. Her mother was once an alcoholic and beat her when she was little and her father had left her at a young age.

Her mother had remarried to a person named Naraku and Naraku had been the father she never had and always wanted. That was until her mother began to try and control him too. Their relationship had turned into nothing but arguments.

When he had met her parents he could see that her mother was nothing short of a horrid lady. He got along with Naraku very well though. Naraku was a very polite and nice man, although Naraku had threatened to castrate him if he ever hurt Kagome. Naraku also told him that he should keep a close eye on Kagome and make sure that she was always happy. Not to mention the handy little shotgun was in the closet if Kagome ever came crying to him if he hurt her.

He remembered when it was Kagome's junior home coming dance and she had refused to go. He had asked her why and she told him she hated to wear dresses. He had shaken it off and he had spent what was supposed to be her home coming together. He remembered when they were sitting together in his apartment when things started to heat up. He remembered trying to take off her shirt when she suddenly pulled away. He held her closely and told her that she could trust him. When she finally calmed down she cautiously told him that she had cut herself.

He had thought it was probably was a small kitchen accident but he was way off. When she had rolled back her sleeves he was shocked to fins that she had been cutting herself. She cried and told him that it had started in eighth grade. She had held her by the shoulders and told her that she needed to stop. He told her that he would protect her and always be by her side mentally and physically.

They had been together for three years and she was now finishing high school and he was taking over his fathers business. Through the course of three years he taught Kagome to be stronger and eventually the cutting had stopped. Kagome was a very independent and strong girl who would not tolerate anyone's crap. Sesshomaru was very proud of the improvement she had made.

He scoffed at himself. Right now he was being the biggest fag alive. He was cheating on her and he didn't even tell her. He couldn't stand himself right now. He wanted to kick his own ass. He didn't know if her deserved her anymore. The only thing that kept him from telling her was his goddamn pride.

-----

Kagome rolled around her sleep and was woken up by a very peeved Rin.

"Nee-chan! You woke me up." Rin pouted. Kagome let a small smile grace her lips and she whispered a small sorry and let out a cat-like yawn. She looked at her cell phone that lay on her dresser and wrinkled her nose at it. It was six thirty in the morning. She opened the phone and looked at the two text messages that were left unread. One was from Kouga at twelve at nigh and another from Sango and six in the morning. Kouga was probably confessing his undying love for her and Sango probably wanted to hang out at the mall after graduation ended.

"Can I talk to Sesshomaru-kun?" Rin asked as she saw Kagome pick up the phone. Kagome dialed his number and put it on speakerphone.

"Kagome I am busy right no-"

"Sesshomaru-kun!" Rin squealed.

"Konichiwa Rin. How are you?" asked Sesshomaru. Rin and Sesshomaru talked for a good ten minutes talking about how Rin had a loose tooth. Sesshomaru had told her that she should put it under her pillow for the tooth fairy.

"Do you wanna speak to Kagome-nee-chan?" Rin asked. There was silence on the other line.

"Maybe later." Sesshomaru said shortly. Rin looked at Kagome with a confused expression.

"Are you mad at Kagome-nee-chan?"

"I have got to go." And with that Sesshomaru hung up. Rin looked at Kagome and handed her the phone. Kagome took it and put it on her dresser and stood up.

"Rin can you go to your room?" Kagome asked quietly. Rin nodded her head and ran into the room that was across from Kagome's. Kagome picked up the phone again and began to text Sesshomaru the she stopped. She sat down on the edge of her bed and sighed. She would go over to his house after work and talk with him. But for now, she would get ready for her graduation. Then she thought again. Her graduation didn't start until two and it was seven in the morning. Maybe she could go visit Sesshomaru at his work.

------

Sesshomaru sat as his desk and looked out the window. He looked down at the people that walked around the streets. He scoffed at them. What did they honestly do during the day? He looked at the calendar that was on his desk and looked at the date. It was Kagome's graduation and she had asked that he come to the graduation. He looked at the clock that hung over the doorway and groaned.

It was six thirty in the morning. His phone began to ring and he looked at the caller id. It was Kagome. He hesitantly picked it up and answered it.

"Kagome I am busy right no-" he lied but then was cut off by her younger sister, Rin. He talked with the little four-year old girl and stiffened when she asked him if he wanted to talk to Kagome.

"Maybe later." He said coldly. Then Rin asked a very hard question to answer.

"Are you mad at Kagome-nee-chan?" she asked innocently. He frowned and stayed quiet. Of course he wasn't mad at Kagome. But instead of saying no he said a harsh, "I have got to go." He hung up and rubbed his temples. Then the door to his office opened and in came Kagura.

Sesshomaru couldn't figure out why he would cheat on Kagome with Kagura. He loved Kagome more than Kagura. Kagome was ten times more beautiful than Kagura.

While Kagura cared more about her figure and what she was wearing, Kagome had cared less about make up and loved to eat whatever she wanted. Kagura's mahogany eyes were more reserved and cold than Kagome's expressive blue eyes. The attitudes were completely different. Kagura hated to show emotion and hardly ever smiled. Kagome on the other hand had always been proud to show her emotions and Kagome's smiles were enough to brighten Sesshomaru's boring day.

"Sesshomaru, would you like to go out and eat with me later on?" Kagura asked. Sesshomaru raised an eyebrow and looked at Kagura.

"No."

"Why?"

"Because I have more important plans than to eat with you." He said coldly. Kagura walked up to his desk and sat in the chair that lay across from him. She leaned across the desk, intending to show ample cleavage and seduce Sesshomaru like she had before, when she spotted the calendar.

"Ah. Going to your little girls graduation." She mocked. She disliked Kagome very much due to the fact that she had Sesshomaru. But for the past month Kagura had had sex with Sesshomaru. She smirked at the picture that Sesshomaru had on his desk. It was the typical photo booth pictures. She was rather surprised to see that Sesshomaru had let a small smile grace his godlike face in those pictures.

"You tread on dangerous grounds Kagura." He hissed out. He tried hard not to stare at the flesh she was revealing to him. It wasn't that he was a sex-crazed man; it was just that Kagome didn't have sex with him. The first year wasn't that hard but going to the second and third year cold showers just didn't do it. Then Kagura happened to bump into him at a club and Sesshomaru had drunk a little and the rest was a blur to him.

"Oh calm down you fluffed up inu." Laughed Kagura. She stood up and walked up and went around and began to rub Sesshomaru's shoulders. He let out a warning growl and she laughed again. "Don't get all riled up. You just look really tense."

"Woman, get your hands off of my person." He grounded out. She merely turned his chair towards him and sat on his lap and began to unbutton his top and undid the tie. She felt a pair of hands stop her and she smirked. She tilted her head up and kissed him.

Suddenly the door was opened and in came Kagome. She stood at the door with a look of pure shock when she saw what Sesshomaru was doing. Sesshomaru pushed Kagura off him who fell with a scowl and he stepped towards Kagome. With each step he took forwards she took two back.

"Kagome listen to me-"

"It's okay Sesshomaru you should tell her that I have fucked you for the past month behind her back." Kagura piped in.

"Shut the fuck up Kagura!" yelled Sesshomaru. He looked at Kagome's face and was unhappy to see the tears fall down her face. He hated her tears. She took off in a dead sprint and Sesshomaru tried to catch up with her. She had run to the elevator and had gotten in and it closed just as Sesshomaru was going to reach for her.

-------

Kagome looked around the elevator and was glad no one was in it with her. Then it all seemed to come crashing down on her and she fell to her knees in the elevator. The tears fell down freely and she fisted her hands in her shirt.

She finally understood that he was tired of her. She knew that he wanted more and probably couldn't stand innocent little Kagome. She stood up shakily and rubbed the tears away from her face. Her eyes turned blank and she walked out of the elevator ignoring the looks that Sesshomaru's workers were giving her.

She couldn't stand the look of pity everyone was giving her. She walked up to the receptionist's desk and took her cell phone out and the promise ring that he gave to her on their third anniversary. The ring had a blue diamond and had **I love you my one and only.** engraved on the gold band.

The black haired receptionist looked at her questioningly.

"Can you give this to Sesshomaru and tell him not to force himself to come to my graduation because I will not go. Tell him that this will be my goodbye and he will not have to see me ever again and tell him to tell Rin that I will miss her." She said emotionlessly. Yura, the receptionist nodded and bit her lip.

"Kagome-chan… whatever you saw, you must know Sesshomaru-sama loves you-"

"No he doesn't. I realize that he has grown tired of me. Goodbye Yura." Said Kagome and she turned and left the building ignoring Yura's yells.

_He truly doesn't love me anymore._ Was the only thing going through her mind. She wandered aimlessly down the street and arrived at her house and walked through the doors when she was smacked in the face. Her mother was at the door and she was really drunk.

"Where the fuck did you go?" he mother said softly. "Wait I can guess, you went to Sesshomaru to go and be a whore." She raised her hand and slapped Kagome again. She pulled Kagome up by the shirt and brought it her up to her face. Kagome turned her head away from her mother. The smell of vodka was enough to make her sick. With unknown strength, Kagome's mom threw her against the wall and closed the door.

"Naraku is not here to save you this time." Her mother hissed out. "That bastard had to go to work today." She smiled suddenly and reached for the vodka bottle. She shattered it against the table and took threatening steps toward Kagome who made no move to go anywhere. She was about to slice her daughter when her hand was caught. The person pressed a pressure point on her neck and she passed out.

"Kagome are you okay." The person asked. It was Naraku. "Goddamn it. I knew she would pull a fucking stunt like this." He cursed at Kagome's mother.

He scratched his head and examined his daughter. He picked her up and carried her to her room. He bandaged the scratches that Kagome's mom hade made with her nails and he noticed the vacant look in her eyes he pushed her bangs away and kissed her forehead.

"Are you okay Kagome?" he asked.

"Yes." Kagome said vacantly. Naraku sighed and ushered her to sit on her bed. He sat next to her and held her.

"Your mother is going to be sent to a mental institution and Rin and you will be free from all of that abuse. Then we can be a real family. You can be happy and I would wish nothing more. You can also have Sesshomaru at the house anytime you'd like." Naraku said quietly. He loved Kagome as a daughter and he would do anything to help her. He was excited to see his daughter go across the stage and get her diploma.

"Okay." She said emptily and vacantly. Naraku scrutinized her and hugged her tightly.

"Are you sure nothing is wrong?" he asked. Kagome shook her head and Naraku stood up. "You can tell me anything hon. I am going to pick up Rin from daycare. I'll see you in an hour." He left her room and closed it softly.

Kagome stared vacantly at the walls and saw a glint of silver in the floor. She went to it and picked it up. She smiled hollowly. It was her escape. The razor.

--------

Sesshomaru growled in frustration as the doors closed he ran to the other side of the building to the stairs. He flung the door open and raced down the steps. By the time he reached the first floor he ran to the receptionist's desk.

"Where did she go?" he asked Yura. Yura took a deep breath and hoped Sesshomaru would get the message loud and clear.

"Well, she told me to tell you not to come to her graduation because she will not go and she told me to tell you that you should tell Rin that Kagome says goodbye and that she will miss her." she said slowly. She watched as all of the color drained out of Sesshomaru. She held out a shaking hand and Sesshomaru looked at what was in it and he grabbed it with gentleness. It was Kagome's promise ring.

"She wouldn't…" he said softly. Fear flashed through his mind and he took off and went to his car. He cursed as he pulled from the parking lot as he saw the traffic that was pilling up. Not caring if anyone saw him he got out of the car and leaped from building to building.

----

She made no noises as the blade sliced into her wrist. She welcomed the pain that kept her mind from him. Blood dripped down her arm and she didn't even realize it fell to the carpet in little pools. This time she didn't stop when she felt light headed. She wanted the pain to completely consume her and take away. She slid the blade over again and again. Things were starting to flash in her mind. His face and the memories of him started to fade slowly.

She heard a sudden crash and she looked towards her window. Sesshomaru lunged at her and wrenched the blade away from her. She began to struggle and Sesshomaru grabbed her wrist causing her to hiss in pain.

"What the fuck are you thinking?" he roared. She freed one of her wrist and tried to reach for the blade that lay a few inches away. Sesshomaru tugged her up and smacked the blade out of her hands again.

"Let me go." She screamed. "Let me go!!" she began to thrash violently in his arms and he held her as tight as he could so she couldn't move.

"Listen to m-"

"NO!"

"KAGOME LISTEN TO M-"

"No no no no no no no!" she yelled back. He threw her on her bed and he pinned her down. She fought against him and he bent down to kiss her. She whipped her head from side to side and cried. Sesshomaru sat on her waist and yanked her wrist up and examined the wounds. He growled loudly.

"Do you like hurting yourself?" he roared. She looked down him unfazed.

"What if I do?" she yelled back. "It keeps you away!"

"No it doesn't! It makes me worry about you even more! I wont leave you because I love you and care about you."

"No! You care more about that woman and you are tired of me. You don't love me anymore." She sobbed. Sesshomaru looked at her in shock. He brought her wrist up to his lips and licked the nearly fatal wound she inflicted upon herself. He felt the wound close and he sighed in relief. He looked at her face and brushed away her tears with a clawed finger.

"I love you and only you Kagome." He whispered. "I am… sorry for the pain… I… have caused."

"What about the woman you had sex with…" sniffed Kagome. She hiccupped and Sesshomaru let out a small sad smile. He sighed and got off of her and placed her on his lap. He cradled her body and placed his chin on top of her head.

"That woman was a mistake. I was slightly intoxicated and she… was just there." He said cautiously. He felt Kagome stiffen. "But… like I said, I will always be in love with you for the rest of my life." He placed a small kiss on her head and closed his eyes.

Kagome moved her head and looked into Sesshomaru's eyes. What she saw was pure love for her. She felt a tug at her heart and she lifted her head and kissed Sesshomaru on the lips. The kiss was simple but caused a thousand things to go through her head. He pulled away and lifted her chin. He touched the bruise and the marks that adorned her face and began peeling away the bandaged and frowned.

"I didn't do it to myself if that is what you want to know." Kagome said quietly. "My mom did. But Naraku said she is leaving today for the mental institution."

"Good." Was all he said. He tilted her face and swiped his tongue across her scratch and savored the taste of her sweet blood again. He gave one last lick and pulled away and looked at the newly healed skin. "Promise me you will never hurt yourself again."

Kagome bit her lip and Sesshomaru's eyes darkened. He gave off a low growl and set her on the bed. He wrenched open one of her little boxes on her dresser and pulled out a razor blade. Kagome looked away in shame and turned her head back only to see Sesshomaru pull his sleeve up and slowly drag the razor across his blemish free wrist. A scream escaped her lips and she lunged for him, ripping away the razor from his grasp.

She frantically scrambled to the bathroom and grabbed a red towel and ran back. She pressed the towel to his wrist and her breath was erratic and tears trailed down her face. With his other hand he lifted up her chin so she could look into his eyes.

"Now do you understand what I go through? How much pain I go through seeing you hurt yourself purposely?" he said sternly. "I will forever ask forgiveness to repent for the sins I have commmited against you. But I will not be able to live seeing you hurt yourself." He gently removed the towel only to show that his wrist was completely healed except for a thin strip of blue on his wrist.

Kagome looked at the scar and her whimpers turned to sobs. Sesshomaru held her and rocked her in his arms. He wound her hands around his waist and laid her head close to his heart. Sesshomaru absentmindedly began to stroke her tangled hair.

"I promise Sesshomaru. I promise."

-----

The graduation went quickly and seemed like a blur to Kagome. The only thing she could think of was Sesshomaru. Her heart still ached from his betrayal but she knew that this fallout would only strengthen their relationship more.

After the night ended and she bid farewell to all of the friends she came to know during the duration of highschool she felt to warm arms hug her from behind. She knew it could only be Sesshomaru.

"I want to take you somewhere koishii." He whispered into her ear. He watched as she nodded in affirmation and he lept from building to building and landed on top a mountain. It faced the sea giving a perfect and tranquil view of Tokyo. He got down on one knee and listened to the erratic beating of Kagome's heart. He grabbed a beautiful ring that had magnificent aqua colored diamonds adorned on a gold band from his pocket and held it up to her.

"Koi. You know I am not a youkai of words but I will say this. You are my life and I refuse to stop loving you. What has happened has happened and will only make us stronger. The scar I have on my wrist signifies that as well. I am prepared to love you and beg for you forgiveness for all eternity only if you would remain by my side. As my wife. My heart. My mate. My soul. You are the bright light that will keep me from eternal damnation. Will you, Kagome Higurashi, be my love for all eternity?" Asked Sesshomaru slowly. Tears gathered in Kagome's eyes and she fell to her knees in front of Sesshomaru.

"Yes."

---------

AN. I know I have yet again started another fanfiction……… again. But this one was a little plot puppy that every night would bark in my head EVERYNIGHT!!!!!! I wanted to throw a shoe at it… but I like this puppy too much. It reminded me of Sesshomaru. I don't know if this is a one-shot or not… so give me some ideas if you'd like it to continue. I'll get back to A Broken Love eventually…

Much love,

Kakuya


End file.
